clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead:

I hate when Caty is not immediately available to read things


immediately


:(

Ok, ok, I’m home now and I’ll take a quick initial read before I go to bed—keep your cute stripper panties on 

Nice n’easy 45 minute domme call at 10 AM this morning. Middle aged working class guy wanted me to tie him down and sit on his face. He even brought his very own easy to use velcro straps, which he attached to the bed himself—that’s service. The only other thing he wanted was “spidertickling”—a fetish I haven’t encountered before. He actually wanted to see a picture of my fingernails beforehand to make sure they were long enough to tantalizingly scratch/tickle him throughout the session. He didn’t even need/want to come, because he said the intense tickling sensation interfered with his arousal, but that’s what he was in it for. It was amusing and low-maintenance, just what I needed with these September appointments that are making up for August. Hopefully the 8 PM I have scheduled will go as smoothly.

So many no calls/no shows I’ve endured lately, or last-minute cancellations in which people have to go to the hospital or get in minor car accidents (?!) The thing is, I even believe some of these people—it’s just my bad luck, not even the bad client factor. I scheduled a two hour call for my doubles partner today, and of course the man had to cancel b/c someone sideswiped him on his way over. He was a sincere sounding young military man who also worked for a group home, and the way he presented the excuse sounded very genuine, so again, I’m just chalking it up to my particular brand of good fortune.

clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead:

marginalutilite:

clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead:

The maxx

Omg, the Maxx—the ultimate in 90s nostalgia. When I was 12? 13? I used to stay up late watching the animated series on MTV, and I scrambled to collect the comic books, I don’t think I ever obtained even a fraction of those that were released. How did you get these? 

In retrospect, though the treatment of Julie’s body image (her sexy potbelly!) and her feminism and autonomy, as well as the subversion of the Maxx’s superhero posturing, were awesome, I’m not sure what to make of the rapey villain, the specter lurking in Julie’s PTSD nightmares. Seems like gratuitous servings of what the fanfic girls call “whump.”

What’s whump? I can’t believe this would have been on mtv either, wild! Julie’s feminism is confusing to me, like, it makes sense kind of in a ptsd way, but it’s still obnoxious to read. Does she change?
I got them on comixology! Comixology also appears to have a bunch of the out of print catwomans, I’m going through them slowly bc they’re mostly boring as shit, verrrrrrry 90s in some of the worst ways, but so far all complete.

"Whump"= unnec emotional and/or physical suffering on a character’s part for the voyeuristic enjoyment of the audience
Oh, that’s right, Julie is a “Paglia feminist,” right? Ughhh. I just remember that scene you scanned above, and I thought in general the comic had a good representation/grasp of feminism.

"I don’t ever wanna do sex work again where theres a possibility of making NO money."

portlandvalentine says it all (via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

When I read strippers speaking dismissively of escorts, I think, ‘sure, I suck a lot of dick, but I’ve never ended a work day owing the house money.”

(via toomuchperfume)

It’s the best! No giving money to the people who grope you and untie your outfits and spank you and don’t enforce tipping policies, or the people so casually dismissive of strippers’ lives that they film them overdosing or say they deserved suicide, no payout to djs who don’t take requests or remind customers to tip. It’s a whole new world.

(via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

… I’m an escort who has definitely finished the day owing the house money. Agency escorting is a thing. It sucks, but it’s a thing.

(via ifiwakeinthemorning)

Ugh what? They don’t just take a cut of your calls, you have to pay to work?

(via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

They take a cut of our calls (50%, 60% for credit cards), plus we pay drivers out of our pocket, plus we have to pay a weekly amenities fee, plus we buy condoms, lube and the compulsory thigh high stockings out of our pocket - and we often buy them from the house bc of time restraints. Because it takes 3+ weeks for our credit card payments to be processed and the only part that we don’t have to pay in cash is that 60% cut, it’s quite easy to lose money on a shift.

(via ifiwakeinthemorning)

Oh my god that’s terrible! Is it all by CC, do any of your clients pay cash?

(via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

I have definitely worked weeks and been on tours where I’ve ended in the red. My outgoings are high, and sometimes work is slow or you have a lot of cancelations. It’s a shitty feeling walking out of an unpleasant booking knowing you can’t even keep that money and all it does is go back into the expenses of making sure you can keep having (possibly unpleasant) bookings.
BUT at least most of the time if I’m not making money I’m doing something else, even if it’s sitting on my arse racking up expenses, as opposed to working in a club and racking up house debt.

The only sex work I ever did when I could get in and out in a week and never owe money was working in a brothel that didn’t take house fees or give out fines. No outgoings for condoms etc. and the only expenses were outfits and transport to and from.

(via askasexworker)

I forget, is independent fs legal/decriminalised where you are or do you HAVE to work in a brothel if you want to not risk arrest?

(via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

This just makes me SO grateful for the fact that even when I was starting out, the indie workers I trained with/worked for charged only a very small commission. I can’t imagine LOSING MONEY doing full service work—that’d just be so completely demoralizing. I always wonder what benefits agencies provide their workers, exactly—is it all just a scam? B/c they don’t seem to screen clients very well for people, and the drivers don’t offer good service or adequate security. Kate Zen was explaining at least how Chinese and Korean agencies in big cities  provide some security for recent immigrants who don’t know English yet and don’t have working papers, so that particular working relationship makes sense to me even though it sounds oppressive in many instances, but in other cases it just baffles me. Please forgive/correct me if I’m being dense or laterally whorephobic about this.

(via clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead)

clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead:

The maxx

Omg, the Maxx—the ultimate in 90s nostalgia. When I was 12? 13? I used to stay up late watching the animated series on MTV, and I scrambled to collect the comic books, I don’t think I ever obtained even a fraction of those that were released. How did you get these? 

In retrospect, though the treatment of Julie’s body image (her sexy potbelly!) and her feminism and autonomy, as well as the subversion of the Maxx’s superhero posturing, were awesome, I’m not sure what to make of the rapey villain, the specter lurking in Julie’s PTSD nightmares. Seems like gratuitous servings of what the fanfic girls call “whump.”

bert-and-ernie-are-gay:

decembercat:

can someone explain to me how a Companion is not a stigmatized position and yet time and time again, Inara is insulted and demeaned. Men are in love with her because she’s skilled and gorgeous, but when she turns them now or demands they don’t treat her like a piece of property…

(as always dying to know what
marginalutilite
thinks abt Inara’s depiction/representation in this ‘verse)

Here is your sex worker authored analysis of the lateral whorephobia/classism inherent in Inara’s character, courtesy of moremaggiemayhem I’d really love to do a Support Hos piece covering Firefly on Tits and Sass, but I think Maggie pretty much nails it all here.

I also find the Mal/Inara ship viscerally disgusting, personally, not some cute Beatrice/Benedict thing like Joss apparently thinks he’s got going on there.

leighalanna:

icanhassugar:

sugarvenomqueen:

phoeniiiix:

Besides the ever lovely strippingandsugaring and the alluring tieme-takeme, are there any other sex workers (stripper, escort, SB, cam girl, dom, etc.) that are currently in a serious relationship?

I’ve been with my significant other for almost two…

I’m getting married in a year. He knows about it all. He gets it and he understands that it’s good for me right now. We continuously check in about the emotional aspects and stay open. We don’t talk about the sexual piece in detail. The financial piece is huge for us because we’re paying off debt and trying to save up for our life together.

Confession: sometimes he’ll go to where I’m having a date and watch me with the guy. He likes to see me in action and playing the part, and I enjoy having an audience ;)

I’ve been married to one partner for almost four years and just celebrated (well, we haven’t celebrated yet, because i stink) one year of knowing my absolutely lovely girlfriend. I have never had work related problems with either of them (lucky me! this has not always been true with past partners).  For me, since what I do is non-negotiable, it’s always something I’m super upfront with partners about from date one — I figure I waste everyone’s time less that way, and handily weed out anyone for whom it’s going to be a problem.  The biggest stress it has ever really caused in either of these relationships is the work part of sex work, not the sexy party — being a freelancer with needy clients means that it hasn’t always been easy to find the right balance of tending to my business and being a good friend and partner to the people who matter.  

Don’t settle for people who tolerate what you do. They always reach the end of their “patience” sooner or later.

I’ve been with my primary partner for a decade now. He’s an older working class/lumpenproletariat man who did street sex work and informal sex work when he was younger. When I did outcalls, he was my driver, and he’s always been a great person to dish about clients and the best ways to handle them. He’s also given me great advice about trusting my instincts during calls. I’m really lucky to have him to rant/ give elaborate session post-mortems to. 

missveeau:

stinababy30:

Escorts, do you have something like a punchcard policy for your regulars? Mami’s told me a lot of escorts do that. He was gently suggesting a free or deeply discounted session maybe pretty soon. I said I would, but I really don’t want to.
I kinda feel like I’m getting to the point of keeping a score card with him…like, he get points for this and that, but a check for this and that. Not a good place to be. :-/

No. No. No. No. No. 
You’re not a $3 cup of coffee. You’re a human being. You have to put time and effort into getting ready, planning your life, making sure you’re beautiful, booking rooms, travelling and then theres the booking itself, that stuff is a lot of work, and shouldn’t be given away as a freebie because someone has seen you more than once. You’re not a fucking starbucks. 
I would explain to him that you’re running a business and no good business woman gives away freebies or does favours. 
Jesus what a cock. 

Agree. I can’t believe he tried to convince you that this “punchcard” nonsense is a standard practice. I’ve never had a regular, not even my most annoying regular, have the sheer ball/temerity to make that request.

missveeau:

stinababy30:

Escorts, do you have something like a punchcard policy for your regulars? Mami’s told me a lot of escorts do that. He was gently suggesting a free or deeply discounted session maybe pretty soon. I said I would, but I really don’t want to.

I kinda feel like I’m getting to the point of keeping a score card with him…like, he get points for this and that, but a check for this and that. Not a good place to be. :-/

No. No. No. No. No. 

You’re not a $3 cup of coffee. You’re a human being. You have to put time and effort into getting ready, planning your life, making sure you’re beautiful, booking rooms, travelling and then theres the booking itself, that stuff is a lot of work, and shouldn’t be given away as a freebie because someone has seen you more than once. You’re not a fucking starbucks. 

I would explain to him that you’re running a business and no good business woman gives away freebies or does favours. 

Jesus what a cock. 

Agree. I can’t believe he tried to convince you that this “punchcard” nonsense is a standard practice. I’ve never had a regular, not even my most annoying regular, have the sheer ball/temerity to make that request.

(via missveeau-deactivated20140914)

E-mail I sent to my local bad call e-mail list about a caller I spoke to yesterday—I don’t know why I spoke to him for as long as I did, but the psyche of the male idiot is so pathetically fascinating

E-mail I sent to my local bad call e-mail list about a caller I spoke to yesterday—I don’t know why I spoke to him for as long as I did, but the psyche of the male idiot is so pathetically fascinating

Going on yet another adventure I’ll never remember with the Ambien walrus, so you know what that means—ignore anything I say online for the next 8 hours.

I can’t believe Ms. Magazine scooped Tits and Sass on interviewing PJ Starr about her documentary on Marcia Powell! If only we’d scheduled her interview for this week rather than the next. Oh, well, at least our interview will be BETTER. Yup, I’m petty like this.

Ms. Magazine, of all magazines!

Though, I suppose if Ruth Jacobs wrote it, I guess I’m more okay with it ;)

That warm fuzzy feeling of knowing sex worker tumblr has your back. Well, and also that extremely brilliant women have your back. I love you all!
clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead catsuitmonarchy leighalanna evolvingmatter
( leighalanna, remember you posted wondering whose biggest fan you were? You often appear as mine, and are almost always in my top 4.)
( clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead , on an unrelated note, before I knew what you looked like, I always pictured you as actually looking like Clara Webb, and sometimes I still do.)

That warm fuzzy feeling of knowing sex worker tumblr has your back. Well, and also that extremely brilliant women have your back. I love you all!

clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead catsuitmonarchy leighalanna evolvingmatter

( leighalanna, remember you posted wondering whose biggest fan you were? You often appear as mine, and are almost always in my top 4.)

( clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead , on an unrelated note, before I knew what you looked like, I always pictured you as actually looking like Clara Webb, and sometimes I still do.)

marginalutilite:

ikandybyiconik:

marginalutilite:

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to ANY other sex worker.

What’s considered a reasonable amount?

I really shouldn’t be helping you do research that’s pretty straight forward, but the lowest “specials” I’ve seen in my area  are $80-$100 for the half-hour, and even then, many of us get irritated with those who offer these specials for lowering price expectations. I would actually still be annoyed at a prospective client who presumptuously named these prices. When I offer half hours, they’re $150, and that’s when I do offer half hours, which is rare—usually when I already have an incall room secured and I might as well. Many escorts don’t offer half hours at all and expect you to invest in at least an hour, if not 90 minutes or 2 hours.

I hope my above comments about street workers weren’t laterally whorephobic in any way. To be clear, I’ve done car calls in bouts of withdrawal fueled desperation, and I don’t even have the excuse of being an amateur/litehook. I feel bad for litehooks of any sort, whether on escort or street level, because they could be making so much more, but since they only do sex work occasionally and informally, they have no idea what to charge and always short themselves. For example, my doubles partner’s new bf is a dealer, and recently a couple of 20 year old women have been following him around. My doubles partner and her bf were making bets about when they’d offer him a blowjob for some dope. Then it turns our they offer him a *threesome* for a bundle. Now, a blowjob for a bundle would at least be economically rewarding, since that’s $50-$70. But a *threesome* for the equivalent of $25 for each of them? And one of them is pregnant, so she could be making tons from pregnancy and lactation fetishists. Any street worker or escort could easily advise them on how to make enough money that they’d never have to be at the mercy of any dealer again. But since they don’t think of themselves as sex workers, or in the sex trade, when they do end up doing sex work, they put themselves at disadvantage.

marginalutilite:

ikandybyiconik:

marginalutilite:

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to ANY other sex worker.

What’s considered a reasonable amount?

I really shouldn’t be helping you do research that’s pretty straight forward, but the lowest “specials” I’ve seen in my area are $80-$100 for the half-hour, and even then, many of us get irritated with those who offer these specials for lowering price expectations. I would actually still be annoyed at a prospective client who presumptuously named these prices. When I offer half hours, they’re $150, and that’s when I do offer half hours, which is rare—usually when I already have an incall room secured and I might as well. Many escorts don’t offer half hours at all and expect you to invest in at least an hour, if not 90 minutes or 2 hours.

I hope my above comments about street workers weren’t laterally whorephobic in any way. To be clear, I’ve done car calls in bouts of withdrawal fueled desperation, and I don’t even have the excuse of being an amateur/litehook. I feel bad for litehooks of any sort, whether on escort or street level, because they could be making so much more, but since they only do sex work occasionally and informally, they have no idea what to charge and always short themselves. For example, my doubles partner’s new bf is a dealer, and recently a couple of 20 year old women have been following him around. My doubles partner and her bf were making bets about when they’d offer him a blowjob for some dope. Then it turns our they offer him a *threesome* for a bundle. Now, a blowjob for a bundle would at least be economically rewarding, since that’s $50-$70. But a *threesome* for the equivalent of $25 for each of them? And one of them is pregnant, so she could be making tons from pregnancy and lactation fetishists. Any street worker or escort could easily advise them on how to make enough money that they’d never have to be at the mercy of any dealer again. But since they don’t think of themselves as sex workers, or in the sex trade, when they do end up doing sex work, they put themselves at disadvantage.

ikandybyiconik:

marginalutilite:

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to ANY other sex worker.

What’s considered a reasonable amount?

I really shouldn’t be helping you do research that’s pretty straight forward, but the lowest “specials” I’ve seen in my area  are $80-$100 for the half-hour, and even then, many of us get irritated with those who offer these specials for lowering price expectations. I would actually still be annoyed at a prospective client who presumptuously named these prices. When I offer half hours, they’re $150, and that’s when I do offer half hours, which is rare—usually when I already have an incall room secured and I might as well. Many escorts don’t offer half hours at all and expect you to invest in at least an hour, if not 90 minutes or 2 hours.

ikandybyiconik:

marginalutilite:

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to ANY other sex worker.

What’s considered a reasonable amount?

I really shouldn’t be helping you do research that’s pretty straight forward, but the lowest “specials” I’ve seen in my area are $80-$100 for the half-hour, and even then, many of us get irritated with those who offer these specials for lowering price expectations. I would actually still be annoyed at a prospective client who presumptuously named these prices. When I offer half hours, they’re $150, and that’s when I do offer half hours, which is rare—usually when I already have an incall room secured and I might as well. Many escorts don’t offer half hours at all and expect you to invest in at least an hour, if not 90 minutes or 2 hours.

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to any other sex worker.

I KNOW. It’s my record, as well. Earlier this week I had someone e-mail asking for a half hour for $60, and I thought THAT was bad enough, only to have someone top it within a few days. Of course, I don’t respond to these messages—gotta give them that, they at least make their insulting cheapness known immediately so I don’t end up wasting any time on them—but I have to wonder whether anyone actually ever does respond to them, whether they actually expect a response? I might’ve told him to try a street worker, but that would be short changing street workers, since I hear that in most street sex work markets, unless someone’s litehooking in an amateurish manner for drugs in a bout of crack fueled desperation (which is an understandably bad situation, obviously), I know most street work sessions start at at least $40, yes? Then again, given this guy’s chutzpah, it’d probably be a disservice to the sex worker community to refer him to any other sex worker.